Asking for a raise is one of the most challenging conversations you can have, especially for a woman. We’re less comfortable with, and therefore less likely to, brag about ourselves and our accomplishments. That makes it pretty hard to get a raise!

So how can we get ahead?

Start with confidence

A confident woman is a powerful woman, which is why you need to examine your self-confidence before you even start thinking about asking for a raise.

How do you feel about yourself, your performance? How much value are you providing to your employer?

These aren’t questions to shy away from!

Start with your soft skills. What unique skills do you have? Are you someone who gets along easily with others? Are you great at managing your time or learning new things? I like to start with soft skills to build confidence because these skills are a part of you. They are ingrained in your being!

You need to take an honest look at what hard skills you bring to the table. I find it easier to list all the things I do and think about how they help others or impact the bottom line. With this list, you can then fully realize how important you truly are to the company.

Confidence also comes from knowing your facts. Be sure to research your job market and salary. How in-demand are your skills? How many jobs are available in your field? What are other people in similar positions making? Is that accurate for your location? Having numbers and stats handy are fantastic when negotiating.

Figure Out What You Need

Promotion vs. Raise

You must know what you need when you’re looking to move forward in your career, which is why you need to know the difference between a promotion and a raise. Each, while similar, ultimately accomplishes something different, so you need to understand what your goals are from the get-go.

Promotion means that you’re taking on a new position with more responsibility. It comes with a new job title and often comes with a raise, but this isn’t guaranteed. Depending on the position you’re being promoted to, you may not get a standard raise. You may see some kind of benefits increase (e.g., making a commission or getting an extra week of vacation). Still, again, it all depends on the position you’re in, the job you’re moving to, how your company typically promotes employees, and of course, what you asked for.

Side note: Don’t make the mistake of being modest and saying you just want a title change. Employers will jump at the chance to change your title, add responsibilities, and pay less than they regularly would. Do not assume they will always act in your best interest.

A raise means that you maintain your same job title but are now making more money. You might have increased responsibilities as these are used to justify your salary increase. Raises typically occur more frequently than promotions, but while promotions are usually more likely prompted by the employer, raises are almost always instigated by the employee.

Which One is Right For You

It’s essential to decide what you want before sitting down with your boss. If you’re looking for more money, then often, a raise is all you need. If you’re looking for a stepping stone in your career and want a job title to match, a promotion might be better suited for you.

Timing

Timing is another piece of the puzzle you can’t ignore. If you’ve just started a new position, you should wait at least six months before approaching your boss for a raise. After that, it should be no more than an annual conversation. It’s a delicate balance, and you shouldn’t constantly be asking for more money. If you educate yourself before asking for a raise, you should be on track.

Another side note: Not all companies give annual raises. Be sure to stay mindful of the policies in your company and how things work. Nothing stops you from asking, but it is beneficial to be aware of the company culture.

Asking for a Raise with Confidence (AKA How to Get More Money!)

1. Determine if a Raise is What You Want

Be mindful of your goals. Do you want more money? A different job title? Determining goals allows you to proceed with confidence and do what you need to have an effective conversation.

You know the saying, “you get what you ask for”? While it’s not always true, you know what is? You don’t ask; you don’t get. Scary right? Know what you want, and plan.

2. Know What You Bring to the Table

Make a list of all of your responsibilities. Have you taken on any new tasks since you were first hired or since your last raise or promotion? Once you’ve finished making this list, you should have a good idea of your skill set and what you bring to the table.

Don’t be afraid to include your soft skills. While hard skills are essential and easier to measure, soft skills are those things that usually come naturally to you and are nearly impossible to teach others. You need to be honest with yourself and not undersell your value because something comes effortlessly to you.

3. Figure Out How That Impacts the Bottom Line

Take your list of responsibilities and think about how they impact the bottom line for your company. It is advantageous to have this information to bring your value to light. Some employers will recognize your worth without breaking it down to the exact cent; however, some people are very fixed on the numbers. Having this prepared shows that you did your homework and you’re serious. Even if you don’t need it, it’s still great information to have to bolster your confidence.

4. Research Similar Companies, Positions, and Your Local Market

Like the previous step, this action empowers you with information to justify your raise. Look at companies in the same industry as yours and preferably a similar size. Be sure to keep location in mind as different areas often have different living costs. Again, this research may be unnecessary but being informed is the best approach.

More more on researching your salary, click here.

Indeed is a great resources for research, click here to check out their salary tools.

5. Set Up a Time to Have a Conversation with Your Boss in Person

Now for the scary part! Approach your boss to arrange an in-person or (face-to-face via Zoom) meeting. You want to ensure this conversation is face-to-face because it shows you’re a confident professional ready to have this conversation. Trying to ask for a raise over an email makes it too easy for your boss to dismiss you.

Again, you don’t want to assume your employer will have your best interests at heart. I have been fortunate enough to work with unreal employers who are thoughtful and caring. Still, I also have to be honest and recognize that not every company has impeccable leadership. You need to be your own champion, and this is best done in-person or via a virtual face-to-face.

6. Practice to Decrease Nerves and Increase Confidence

Practice what you’re going to say. Anticipate responses you may receive from your boss and prepare your answers. Always try to approach practice from the perspective of your boss. Strengthen your position by actively trying to find gaps in your current reasoning.

That way, when the time comes, you’ll be able to speak clearly and directly. You’ll be less flustered if you practice, and that confidence will shine through.

7. Directly Ask for a Raise

Clearly ask for the raise. Just sending a hint isn’t good enough. Your boss may not get the hint, or worse, they might get it and ignore you because they can. Make sure your request is clear and concise. Don’t leave it up to chance by being ambiguous.

8. Be Flexible and Open to Negotiation

As with anything in business, you may not get exactly what you ask for. You need to prepare for and be open to negotiation. Just because you ask for a raise doesn’t mean your boss can give it.

There are tons of ways to prepare for a negotiation. While getting more money on your paycheck is the easiest way to see an increase, there are other ways to secure the extra cash. Look at where you spend your money. Are there any benefits you can ask for that would allow you to save in the long run?

Stay flexible and explore the endless options together.

9. Take Actionable Next Steps

If you are unable to secure your raise, be sure to ask what you can do to make this happen. Do you need to take on more or different responsibilities? Don’t leave empty-handed.

Sometimes companies just can’t give you more, which could very likely be the case in our new COVID reality. Ensure you understand how you can actively contribute to the overall success of your organization. Find out what you need to do to move forward and make more money.

10. Express gratitude

And of course, no matter what happens, be sure to express gratitude. After all, you’re very fortunate to have a paying job! Some people struggle to find work, and the pandemic has made searching for a job more difficult.

Always appreciate your opportunities and openly express yourself. Thanking your boss (regardless of the outcome) is another way to show your confidence. I’m a firm believer that the more you embody an attitude of gratitude, the more opportunities you will have.

Final Thoughts on Asking for a Raise

Asking for a raise isn’t easy. It can be a challenging mental game, especially for women. Being prepared is the best way to boost your confidence and to get as comfortable as possible with an uncomfortable conversation.

Remember:

• Decide what is best for you and determine your needs
• Know what you bring to the table and how it impacts your company
• Do your research keeping in mind factors like industry, company size, and location
• Set up a time to speak face-to-face
• Prepare and practice to decrease nerves and increase confidence
• Be direct with your ask so that you can’t be ignored
• Be open and flexible for negotiation and ask for actionable next steps
• Express gratitude

Asking for a raise is much easier when you prepare and know what to expect. Keep the above in mind, and you’ll rock it! I’ve got my fingers crossed for you!

What do you think is the hardest part of asking for a raise? What are your struggles? Let me know in the comments!